Ain't I A Woman...

My husband and i spent last night "discussing" feminism, in person and through fb, based on one blog about black male priviledge, that my husband felt was pandering to women and another blog about the Rockefellers Re-engineered Women, that i found presents a very narrow view of womanhood. For your own info, both posts can be found here:

http://jewelwoods.com/node/9
http://www.savethemales.ca/001904.html


I was raised that a man (if you have one, and a real one at that) should be the head of the household. But i was also taught that women control the emotional stability of the household. Now that i have a family of my own, my understanding of this is that men, as more physical creatures, provide the physical security and protection of a home, while women, as more emotional beings, make sure that inside of the home is an energy condusive to nourishing life and promoting growth.

This to me is balance, just like you can't have a sports team where everyone is good at one thing, to have a successful family, i think the differences between you and your partner should be seen as strengths, ways in which you can cover each other's backs. I think my problem is i want to much. I think i'm asking too much for a nurturing love from a man, when that's not where their strength is. I can't expect men to have the same conversations as women, because we are different. As my husband said, i deal with this constant inner conflict of wanting the man to be head of the household, which puts him in a physical position, and also wanting him to be sensitive to me as a woman. You can't always have things both ways. I think women need to do some soul searching and decide what the role is that we really want the men in our lives to play, and stick to it. I firmly believe that if you hold people up to standards, they will rise to the occasion - or go away completely, which is fine because you don't need dead weight. But in making the decision of where we want our men to be, we need to make sure we are prepared to offer the best of ourselves and fulfil our roles also. Life isn't a one-sided show.